have you ever been driving for a long time and then realized that you can't remember one thing that happened in the last hour? you know, that moment when your heart jumps and your eyes pop open and your fingers clutch the wheel a little harder and you think 'holy shit my fucking lizard brain has been driving my car'?

that is pretty much how the last six months have been for me. i lost aim and lost contact with a lot of my friends and i really honestly forgot how great the internet can really be. so... my eyes have popped open, my heart isn't beating faster but it does feel pretty down, and my fingers are clutching the keyboard and i'm apologizing. if you care, i mean. maybe nobody missed me. the sad thing is i didn't miss a lot of you because i honestly just got used to things being how they are.

so... how've you been? everything good? thats what i'm wondering.

i think i'm a bit: indifferent

i have headphones with a microphone on them which i use to talk to satan. he tells me about his weekend and how he hates when people on the street say 'hey lucifer' like they know him but they don't know him and just like to believe they're close to a famous person. then i get bored and i have to make up some story about going out to eat with some friends or something because he'll ramble on all month about how he really didnt like back to the future 3 so much and like thats cool and everything but a little obsessive. so but then i'm like yeah well i really gotta go because my friends are pretty hungry and he goes ok well i'll talk to you soon. then he says he's going to watch back to the future 2 because its his favorite (because he doesnt like cowboys or horses either really even though everybody associates the apocolypse horsemen guys with him. he hates that too.) and i'm like good that movie always makes you happy (but i dunno i mean he's kind of a complainer) and then i'm like oh hey are you still holding a grudge on michael j. fox? and he's like if he's still shakin, i'm still mad. and then we laugh for a while and then i'm like ok for reals i gotta go and he's like ok then for reals i'll see you later. i think he knows i'm not out eating with friends because he's satan and all but he never mentions it. i guess he's kind of lonely. super nice guy though.

i think i'm a bit: relieved
driving and crying to: that song from karate kid

So my little membership to livejournal ran out.  I'm not so interested on renewing it until somebody starts paying me, and that means I can't put pictures up here anymore until I get unlazy enough to find out how to do that.  Which means I can't post pictures anymore ever again.

I think I've spent a lot of time talking about this World of Warcraft game so I figured I'd go ahead and show you guys what I'm talking about.

This is my buddy Gaki.

I'm done talking.  I'm going to lay that out there and back away.  Laugh or do whatever you will.

i think i'm a bit: tired
driving and crying to: Weezer - Buddy Holly

monday = aquabats.

my little mantra for this weekend.  that sounds a little rude if you work with me.  i mean, i really need to point out that i love working with you people, but i get a little tired of the customer trash from time to time.  probably i just need more caffeine.  this is not even close to being remotely the point.

monday = aquabats.

an aquabats live show has been a wet dream of mind since i was about 15.  superhero band + big live monsters = happiness.  problem is, when i was a kid they never left the west coast.  now i'm 24 and i can't say i bought or listened to their last 2 albums, but that doesn't matter.  know why?  because

monday = aquabats.

jason said he was going, but i haven't reminded him lately.  guess i'll call him in the morning.  if there's a god, if this is a fair world, there will be no problem finding people who want to see this show.  i mean monster fighting + music x humor - seriousness = a big crowd right?  trust me, if i know you, you're invited to come with me.  but honestly, i'd go by myself even if i had an open wound that wouldn't clot and and air sharks chasing me.  this is probably a once in a lifetime thing.

i hate how these livejournal things always end up feeling like a huge obsessive rant.  bah.  aquabats, make it all better.

i think i'm a bit: chipper
driving and crying to: aquabats - pinch and roll

Tonight I learned that Land of the Dead was worth the 20 year wait. Honestly I guess I'm not allowed to say that, seeing as I really didn't know that much about the series until a few years ago. But, as most of you who know me will relate (listen to me saying most of you who know me. like somebody reads this who doesn't know me) I am...sort of...obsessed with zombies. It's almost unhealthy. I'm the freak who lists Dawn of the Dead in his top 5 films of all time. I'm the guy who will light up like a kid born on 3 mile island when you mention the Z word.

Can I take this time to say this isn't a raging endorsement for the film? You have to understand first that this film is for zombie purists only. Its not a horror film, unless you make more than 100K a year. Zombies have given up on human flesh this time, committing to a diet of pure social activism. There are many ways you could interpret the complexities of the interrelationships between the zombies, the rich and the poor in this caste system horror film.

Am I boring you? Yeah, probably. If I am, please don't watch this movie. Even I think its weird as shit how much I adore this movie, and yeah this whole subject.

Hilarious thing though is a trailer shown before the movie. Apparently Samuel L. Jackson is pairing up with Eugene Levy for a buddy comedy. And can I say... AT LAST!!! I had the idea for this film a long time ago. Even had my pitch all worked out. Check it out: a minority meets a minority, then one minority acts stereotypically and annoys the other minority in a very stereotypical way. the first minority reacts by being even louder and more stereotypical!!! repeat.

I wouldn't include that in this behemoth of a post unless it was relevant. Which I think it is. I mean, is George Romero's entire zombie film career not about the separation of class and racial tension? The zombies work so hard to bring us all together, then Samuel L. Jackson and Eugene Levy fight back, setting us back 10 years. The movie did look pretty funny though, especially the part where they were like "My people were slaves for hundreds of years because of white people!" "Germans slaughtered a large percentage of my people in the 1940's!" "Shut up, you heeb!"

Here's hoping I don't get banned for that one. Signing out, but far from finished talking about zombies.

i think i'm a bit: undead
driving and crying to: Gorillaz - M1 - A1

so tonight i bought this lavender and oatmeal hand soap and a hand towel that matches the shower curtain. i didn't buy a floor mat because they didnt have any even sort of matched. i mean, call me gay but i am NOT mixing warms and cools, earths and metals, or springs and autumns. i may, however, end up matching wal-mart with pier 1. i think one of the queer eye guys is sensing that, and i bet he just did one of those weird sleep jumps where you think you're falling for a second so all your muscles spaz out and you wake up and you realize that you were just doing the weird sleep spaz thing but you still can't go back to sleep because you know it's gonna happen again and it was scary, even if it only lasted a second.

oh, and I found out tonight that when our store got secret shopped the other day that even though taylor got in some trouble (sorry, taylor) the lady (or guy) who did the shopping (is it cool to use this many parenthesis in one sentence?) said something awesome about me. her wording was "The other cafe server was nice and conversational. His name was Brian." i honestly wouldn't even be proud of that not for her wording. because when you watch old tv shows, like Branded, they always would say "He was a man wrongly accused of deserting his friends who wanted only to prove his innocence. His name was Jim." or something.

having your name listed in a sentence after the story is told makes you kind of legendary. its like the lady was telling her kids the story of the man who was both nice and conversational. and her kids will whisper to each other after being tucked in 'do you think he was a real person?' and the other will say 'are you kidding? no way. but... there will be. i will grow up to be like brian.' and then the kids will probably spit on their dad's name because he was nice, but not really conversational. (their dad died in a car wreck when they were 5 and 2, respectively. the little one doesn't remember his father's lack of conversational ability, and no one will tell him until he reaches 15. the feeling of shame from this revelation will drive the young man into a downward spiral fueled by alcohol and drugs. only his brother, a now 18 year old man who has grown up to be both nice and conversational is able to save his younger brother's life.)

all i'm saying is i deserve at least a theme song for this.

i think i'm a bit: tired
driving and crying to: gorillaz - starshine

So today becomes the official Day 1 in the new house. I can say that waking up here is fantastic. My bed is right beside the window, so I can just look over to see the beautiful view from the third floor. (If I didnt tell you before, the windows here are almost full wall. Gorgeous.) My problem right now is that I didn't buy any drinks for the new house, so I think I have to go buy something. Yeah, I know... but don't cry for me, Argentina. I live right next to a grocery store and like 2000 other stores and restaurants.

So, hopefully by Friday I'll have this place all settled in and ready to live in. Adam is moving in next weekend, so I have this whole week of living in a strange solitude. Moving in will keep me pretty busy, which is rocking. If anybody wants to come over, call me or leave a comment here and I'll consider it.

OK. Oh, and P.S. Please stop not updating your journal. (Again, I'm not talking about you, Natalia.)

i think i'm a bit: ecstatic
driving and crying to: Gorillaz - Dirty Harry

So here I am at my parents' house. Day 3. Honestly I'm not complaining, its kind of nice in some ways, but almost as soon as I walked in the door I remember why I had to move out. It just feels like I'm 12 again, and I can't get over that. One week from today I should be moving into my new apartment, yet they haven't called me to confirm that. I just ended 2 consecutive sentences with the word that. AH that makes three.

Is it weird that it made me happy that I checked my friends list and nobody else really updated much lately? (I'm ignoring your million posts which I don't understand Natalia) Usually I feel like the total slacker, but in a week away really no (English) posts have been written. Maybe livejournal is slowly dying, and I'm gonna be the uncool guy because I'm still posting. Dammit, that's what's going to happen. Maybe I should stop typing right now and just toss this...

So obviously I'm bored. And I'm gonna call Summit Green and find out if they're gonna let us move in. UPDATE AT 11!!!

i think i'm a bit: bored
driving and crying to: Tom Petty - American Girl

today i lost a roommate and a dear friend. i just got back from driving yuzo to the airport and seeing him off. i hope i have half as many people seeing me off as yuzo did, though i dont think that many people care that much about me here. and i freaking live here! i hate being a guy seeing another guy off. you have to cuss at them and punch them for leaving before you can hug them.

i spent the last few days trying to make sure yuzo saw everything american. i am proud to say that on his last two days in town he saw star wars, ate ribs and cornbread, visited wal-mart, had an american pizza, and met a certified american bitch at the post office.

to make things worse for me, jason is in new york and fully moved out. sometimes changes in your life rush at you and you blink and everything you know is gone. yuzo and i are very much alike here, because he is of course happy to see family and friends again in japan but sad to leave us. i'll be happy in my new apartment, but i will miss this place with every inch of me.

so... if this is all too sappy, i'm sorry. i probably shouldn't be awake right now as i have to work in 5 hours and i havent slept yet. i just dont care about all that right now. yuzo, you son of a bitch, i'm gonna miss you. and if not for MSN Messenger i'd be on a plane to japan right now, hiding out in some luggage.

i think i'm a bit: lonely
driving and crying to: Modest Mouse - Float On

Wow 2 weeks huh? Yeah, here's the formula for my livejournal:

art + japanese + exams = people don't hear from me for a while

so...but i know some funny stuff has happened. let me sum it up...

Funniest thing in the past two weeks: On May 5th, just outside of the British Consolate in New York at 3 a.m., 2 grenades blew a hole in the front of the building. Nobody died, but its still not funny right? But wait! There's more! The really funny part is that there's a good chance you're hearing about it here first. Because news networks on 24 hours a day couldn't find the time to give a shit about this. ?? I saw it live on CNN at 3:30 in the morning, then after about 10 minutes of coverage they cut away. So I turn it to MSNBC, right? Nothing. Fox News? HA! And honestly, there wasn't really "nothing" on. The really important news was of course being covered. I mean I'm sure everybody heard about that one woman who ran away instead of getting married. I think they even raised the terror alert because of that lady. Honestly scary, I could barely sleep at night.

Amazingly, I pulled off the end of the year catch-up again, and now my exams are pretty much just gonna coast by. I can taste summer now...its so close. I love this time of year. I still havent found a place to move into, but I think we've got a fallback if nothing else. Just need to find a third person, if only for a few months.

I think that catches us up a little bit, and the updates will pump out like crazy this summer. Even if I don't do anything, I'll be around watching the news. And that always gives me shit to make fun of.

Thank you Jesus for 24 hour news networks and Rush Limbaugh.

i think i'm a bit: nostalgic
driving and crying to: Decemberists - 16 Military Wives